Percentage and Points

The smell of backpacks and crayons is in the air again as I wander through the wheedling children at Walmart delicately talking their parents into buying them not only the cool stuff, but as much stuff as possible. Actually I mean college children, little kids only care if it's got something glittery, fuzzy or smells. In a week students will be back and once again I sit here wondering, "where in the hell did my summer go?"

Well the 90% dedicated to working myself self to death, accompanied by the 3% of worrying to death about work, left me with 7% of Wee Hoo time. Which as you know was partially spent kickin it with the drug lords of Everett WA, cause I'm coolly accepted like that.

Oh yes, the Filipino conference. I did promise to blog about that didn't I? I put off telling Mommy Dearest about the conference until the week before, which I know is ridiculous because I'm 40!!!! But trust me the consequences would have been much greater. She called up and asked, er nooooo quizzed me rather, about what I was going to say, and it went something like this:

MD: "So what are you going to say?"
ME: "Ummm I don't know I figured I would see what the other panelists were talking about and wing it from there."

Silence.......

MD: "So are you planning on talking about us?"
ME: "Well that would be the focus of the panel, you know, what it's like to be transnationally adopted. Im sure families would figure in there somewhere."

...and here I waited for the "Don't you dare say bad things about us" lecture, but got this instead..

MD: "Well don't give out any of our personal information. Al Qaeda could be sitting in the audience you know taking notes. Don't say where we live, our phone number, nothing. They will use that information against you and could kidnap us for ransom or something you know. And your brother does work for the government and so did your dad!"

...and silence.....

Me: "Ummmmmm...."
MD: " It's true, I'd say that 90% of the time your in danger in Philippines, and 5% safe. Not like here in the states where your 90% safe and 5% in danger."
ME: " Ummmmm...."
MD: "It's a poor, poor country. You need to talk about the positive things, like that fact that you have a nice job, a home, a car. Things you could not have without coming to America you know."
ME: "Ummmmm..."
MD: Besides they don't have sidewalks over there. What country doesn't have sidewalks?!?! Countries that support Al Qaeda, that's who!!! Maybe we should have bombed the Philippines also to get rid of the Al Qaeda over there!! It's all Obama's fault you know! He let them in over there!!!.....Oh and don't say anything bad about us too while your at it."

.....and release. Ahhhhhhh.....Satisfaction at last.

I KNEW that was coming.

One point for me!!